You Have a Problem

Hello and welcome to You Have a Problem.

I hope that you are all having a great New Year's Eve.

I don't have anything new to report ... so... ... ...

Happy Holiday (Yes, I left out the "s" on purpose)

Aninimous

P.S. Jamsime, if you haven't read yet, the Pink Panther is WRONG!!!

26 Ways to Fail

对于这个非常特殊的方式失败26段，我要摊位。是的，所有拖延的重要任务。我想要做的星期一r的，因为它是鲁贝戈德堡机一天。是的，你们都必须输入。请输入。如果你不记得的规则点击这里 。这篇文章是翻译成好昙花一现的语言，这是在学校里学那么享受这种随机的。这几乎是新的年...事实上，它的新年前夕的前夕！所以走出了卡拉OK套，流行一些天真活泼的苹果汁和2010年倒计时的最后几天。

茉莉花克雷斯波

Aus diesem sehr speziellen Segment von 26 Ways to Fail, ich werde zum Stillstand kommen. Ja, die alle wichtige Aufgabe Stocken. Ich will bis zum Montag wollen r auf, da es Tag ist Rube Goldberg Machine. Ja, Sie müssen alle Kraft. Bitte geben Sie. Wenn Sie sich erinnern nicht den Regeln klicken Sie hier . Dieser Beitrag ist blip übersetzt in die Sprachen dieser gut an, die unterrichtet werden, so genießen Sie diese Schule nach dem Zufallsprinzip. Es ist fast Silvester ... In der Tat-es ist Silvester Vorabend! So bekommen die karoke setzt, Pop einige Schampus Apfelwein und zählen die letzten Tage des Jahres 2010.

Jasmine Crespo

Para este segmento muy especial de 26 maneras de fallar, voy a plaza. Sí, la importante tarea de todos los del atascamiento. Lo que quiero hacer r el lunes, ya que es la máquina de Rube Goldberg días. Sí, todos debemos participar. Por favor, introduzca. Si no recuerdas las reglas, haga clic aquí . Este mensaje se traduce en bien los idiomas que se enseñan en esta escuela para disfrutar de este bache al azar. Es Año Nuevo casi ... De hecho, es víspera de Año Nuevo! Así que los juegos Karoke, pop un poco de sidra de manzana burbujeante y cuenta atrás de los últimos días de 2010.

Jasmine Crespo

Pour ce segment très particulier du 26 Ways to Fail, je vais décrochage. Oui l'importance de la tâche tout décrochage. Je veux faire r le lundi car il est Goldberg jours machine de Rube. Oui, vous devez tous entrer. S'il vous plaît entrer. Si vous ne vous souvenez des règles cliquez ici . Ce message est traduit dans bien des langues qui sont enseignées dans cette école alors profitez de cette blip aléatoire. C'est presque du Nouvel An ... En fait, c'est la veille veille du Nouvel An! Alors, sortez les jeux karaoke, pop un peu de cidre de pomme pétillant et le compte à rebours des derniers jours de 2010.

Jasmine Crespo

For this very special segment of 26 Ways to Fail, I am going to stall. Yes the all important task of stalling. I want to do r on Monday since it is Rube Goldberg Machine day. Yes, you all must enter. Please enter. If you don't remember the rules click here. This post is translated into well the languages that are taught at this school so enjoy this random blip. It's almost New Years... In fact- it's New Year's eve eve! So get out the karoke sets, pop some bubbly apple cider and count down the last days of 2010.

Jasmine Crespo

P.S.

Sorry if the translations are wrong.

Lucky 13

Just to tell everybody who cares, >:D ate toast last night around 6:30 p.m. Otherwise, he has practically dropped of the face of the planet...uh...blog. Thank you Marisa and the Marble Sail for your impressive research on Santa. My advice to Marisa: escape quickly. (The anti-SSS always shows up two and a half hours late; the faster you escape, the sooner they show up.)

Anyway, my major topic for today is the Jellyfish Ambassador! I put the name in purple because he/she seems to have a preference for purple jellyfish. Really. Check it out:

http://honors9th.blogspot.com/2010/12/attack-of-jellyfish.html

So we'll start off with some definitions. These are all from dictionary.com.

The-
(used to mark a proper noun, natural phenomenon, ship, building, time, point of the compass, branch of endeavor, or field of study as something well-known or unique)

Jellyfish-
1. any of various marine coelenterates of a soft, gelatinous structure, esp. one with an umbrellalike body and long, trailing tentacles; medusa.

2. Informal . a person without strong resolve or stamina; an indecisive or weak person.

Ambassador-
1. a diplomatic official of the highest rank, sent by one sovereign or state to another as its resident representative (ambassador extraordinary and plenipotentiary).

2. a diplomatic official of the highest rank sent by a government to represent it on a temporary mission, as for negotiating a treaty.

3. a diplomatic official serving as permanent head of a country's mission to the United Nations or some other international organization.

4. an authorized messenger or representative.

Special thanks to dictionary.com.

Now, we must assume that the fourth definition of 'ambassador' is the one that applies to our particular interests. His or her intentions are far from diplomatic; thus the other three are ruled out. And I doubt he or she is involved with the United Nations.

Now 'jellyfish' is the term that really intrigues me. There are two definitions and we only have two facts that may or may not give us this information. First off, the Jellyfish Ambassador is escorted by the "Man of War jellyfish". Now there is, in fact, a variety of jellyfish (1st definition) that is called the Portuguese man-of-war. However, to be fair, the jellyfish ambassador did not specify whether the escort was Portuguese or not. This leads us to believe that this phrase relates to a different definition. You see, a man of war is also a type of ship. So the term "Man of War jellyfish" is more likely to be a group of weak or indecisive people that are trained for operating such a ship.

Now our second hint is the two pictures. Now these ones clearly point to them being jellyfish of the first definition. However, these pictures were posted by an ambassador. And ambassadors are (or at least should be) masters of public relations. If this person possessed such skills, then they would realize that pictures of weak and indecisive people would be unimpressive. Therefore, the credibility of all similar claims as to the definition of jellyfish by said ambassador is very doubtful.

I can't say much about 'the'. It's pretty straightforward.

I guess the only way we'll solve this problem is to gain information from Patrick Suanda and Reper Stone who have seen said jelly fish.

Until next time.

Peter Rosen

You Have A Problem

Hello and welcome. We are here after the holidays, and now Patrick Suanda is back up to his dastardly deeds. His minions are out in force again all over Murray. Jessica Morpen, your first job is to capture as many SSS agents as possible. I have seen many of them in force around the movie theaters. If you can do that, then great.

Patrick, Jasmine brings up a question. Are you really just a scrooge, that has had bad childhood experiences. If you are you should just tell us, and we can stop all of this nonsense.

Also, you do not think that Aninimous is my real name. I know my parents had bad choices of names, but I did not think that they did that bad. I can't believe you don't think that this is my real name.

Anyway, Santa is safe now and in our custody. Well, now I have some quotes for you guys to figure out.

1. Let me get you up to speed. We know nothing. Now you are up to speed.

2. And I do speak English. Oh Really. Prove it.

3. What do you think this is?

A tape recorder?

No. It only looks like a tape recorder. It's actually a pen.

4. What is the password!

Ambargur.

You have to say these all in a French accent.

That is all for now.

Aninimous

26 Ways to Fail

Welcome to 26 Ways to Fail! Isn't today a wonderful day? It's so quiet and peaceful... To bad the snow that came was a little late and that it didn't snow on Christmas. Oh well the next major event is New Years! So enjoy the peaceful time until then. By now most of you are enjoying your Christmas presents and having a ball! Or are really bored out of your mind. At least we all have The Little Prince to read. That will keep you busy for the 45 seconds it takes to read... okay more like minutes but it still is a REALLY quick read. So Q is it now...Hmm... Here are the answers! Mwa haha.....
Q: Are you going to quit?
A: Not at the moment. Maybe never. I have no idea.
Q:Are you really joining the anti-SSS?
A:I am undecided yet. Jessica Morpen joined the anti-SSS if anyone noticed. But not me. I still need more proof on both sides to decide.
Q:Does Patrick Suanda really not hate Christmas?
A:He probably is a scrooge and had a bad childhood with Christmas. Can't really blame him. Also, considering he is evil he probably always got coal and/or socks for Christmas. That tends to scar a child. He probably is a big softy with a big warm heart that tries to act tough because he is sensitive.
Q:Will Aninimous' true identity ever be revealed?
A:Everyone basically already knows. So... Pending...
Q:Will I ever stop asking yes or no questions?
A:Possibly (see there was one)
Q:Will i continue asking useless questions?
A:There is not really useless questions, just redundant, rhetorical...etc...
Q:Was the lower case i intentional?
A:Yes

Have a nice break and remember:

Have a Happy New Year!

Jasmine Crespo

P.S.
Thanks to all who asked questions. Shame on all those who didn't.

P.P.S
Here's a question/logic puzzle I love!

Who owns the fish?

The Brit lives in the red house

The Swed keeps dogs as pets

The Dane drinks tea

The green house is on the left of the white house

The green homeowner drinks coffee

The person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds

The owner of the yellow house smokes Dun Hill

The man living in the center house drinks milk

The Nor lives in the first house

The man who smokes Blends lives next to the house with cats

The owner who smokes Bluemaker drinks beer

The German smokes Prince

The Nor Lives next to the blue house

The man who smokes blends has a neighbor who drinks water

This is a really good and hard one. Enjoy! (and I want to see if your answers match up with mine...)

A Christmas Dilemma

Santa Claus came this morning, and went just as quickly, leaving behind presents and candy galore. The festivities were fun, and it was the best day of the year, and no one even remembered the bulging stocking that was shoved in a corner throughout the busy day. Now here I sit, staring at my boatload of candy, from Santa and from friends (especially one friend in particular) and wonder how on earth I am going to dispose of it. I cannot eat it all, that's for certain, lest I become 30 pounds heavier in one week, but I cannot just leave it sitting in the open, and my family will not even be able to eat it all. So what should I do with it? No one can let good candy go to waste....
*Please comment


-Aurora

Lucky 13

I won't say much. Just very simply:

Merry Christmas

Peter Rosen

Christmas Present for...

This is a Christmas Present for:
Jasmine C.
Peter Rosen
Aninimous
All the SSS members
Anyone else involved in this blogs madness
Username: nationpenguino@gmail.com
Password: thelucky13
Please go to this website and get the password and username from this post it will only be up for a while so please go as fast as you can:

www.26waystofail.blogspot.com

Merry Christmas!

For the Believers

Santa Facts

No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species
of living organism yet to be classified, and while most of these are
insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule our flying reindeer,
which only Santa has ever seen.

There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. But since
Santa doesn't (appear to) handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist
children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - or 378 million
according to the Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census)
rate of 3.5 children per household, that is 91.8 millions homes. One
presumes there's at least one "good" child in each.

Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different
time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels East to
West (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second.
This is to say that for each Christian household with good children,
Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump
down the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house.
Assuming that each one of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed
around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but for the
purpose of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78
miles per household, a total trip of 75 and a half million miles, NOT
counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours,
plus feeding etc. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per
second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For purpose of comparison, the
fastest man made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky
27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per
hour.

The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each
child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego Set (2 lbs), the sleigh is
carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight.
On landing, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 330 pounds. Even granting
that "flying reindeer" (see point 1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we
cannot do the job with eight, or even nine reindeer. We need 214,200 reindeer. This
increases the payload, not even counting the weight of the sleigh, to 353,430 tons!
Again for comparison - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth!

353,430 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This
will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as space craft re-entering the earths
atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy ...
per second ... EACH! In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously,
exposing the reindeer behind them, and creating deafening Sonic Booms in their wake.
The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa,
meanwhile, will be subject to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity.
A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his
sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.

So how does Santa do it? How does Santa complete the trip year after year? Is there
something else that we don't know?

Of course silly... Santa is a magical, Mystical Elf... you just have to believe in
him and his Incredible,Magical, Mystical Extraordinary powers!

Everyone knows that when he touches his nose Magic Happens!

If you don't, you'll be put on his naughty List

This is brought to you by the Marble Sail in a temporary alliance with Marisa Bell. Soon, Marisa shall be executed so she wishes to give you all a Chirstmas gift. Please contact her as soon as you can as this blog is insecure. The contact information is as follows: Email: Contact Jasmine if you don't have it already, Phone #: Contact Jasmine, or Any other means of communication: Contact Jasmine.
-the Marble Sail

Who Have a Problem

MERRY CHRISTMAS eve. I hope that you are all excited for christmas. Both me and Patrick Suanda have decided to stop our war... for now. So, Patrick told me that he did not have any evil schemes planned. Although one thing he did do was sing a song. Here is goes.

You see Valentines is torture and my birthday is a mess

New Year's is a lot of noise, and Arbor Days a pest

Halloweens, a horror, but I guess I must confess, that I really don't hate Christmas.

You see Flag Day is infernal, April Fools is just a bore.

Mardi Gras a waste unless you own candy store

All these other holidays I can admit that I abhor, but I really don't hate Christmas.

Now it isn't that I like it at the most I feel ambivalent,

but should I really just destroy it, I admit, that I am still on the fence, it makes me tense!

From the evil scientist community, i'm sure to get ejected,

but for Christmas I can seem to summon, any true objective

I mean what is there to hate, I mean its really so subjective

Thought I really don't hate Christmas

I hate puppy dogs, and kittens, I hate flowers in the spring

Heck, I even hate the sunshine, and the birdies when they sing,

I can work up animosity for almost anything, but I really don't hate Christmas.

Thought my childhood was atrocious, Christmas never was that bad you see.

So the most that I can muster is complete and total apathy... whats wrong with me.

How can I prove that I'm and evil villain worth his salt, that with a holiday so jolly, I can't even find a fault

If I didn't feel ambiguous I'd launch a big assault,

but I really don't hate Christmas. (This is all from memory so I might be wrong.)

I don't have, or feel like writing anything else for now so

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Aninimous

26 Ways to Fail

Welcome, welcome, welcome!
Forget the alphabet! Today is 26 Ways to Fail:

Christmas Special!

I was originally going to have a video of me making a Christmas food but that failed. So instead I'm going to improvise. Christmas is a time for family. Speaking of, my grandparents are staying with me until Sunday! I love them... but with love comes taunt as all of you know.:) My grandma's hair color is interesting this holiday... It's Peach! I am now addicted to chocolate because I received a lot of it for Christmas and got some homemade chocolate treats from my chocolate making Great Aunt Betty. I really want to thank all of my friends for everything.

Please this holiday: FORGET ABOUT THE SSS AND THE ANTI-SSS! ALSO SOFT! Okay. Please guys this is a very special day! It's Christmas Eve Eve! Sing a whole bunch of carols!

Please someone learn "Baby it's cold outside" because I have it stuck in my head and I really want to sing it. Enjoy your break guys! AND ENTER MY CONTEST.

Jasmine Crespo

P.S.

Monday is q for Questions so ask me some questions. I don't care how many or what the content. I know I'm going to pay for it but I'll anwer anything.

Lucky 13

Christmas is back on! Oh yeah did I mention I escaped? Henri (that's Ron by the way-Henri Verdivekt) really didn't even put up that much of a fight. It was easy. Santa will be free until Christmas-I guarantee it. Beyond that, well, the SSS is a powerful organization. And after Christmas, I am officially de-associating myself with the anti-SSS. They simply do not get the job done. I will be a partner with the SofT. They seem promising

Merry Christmas!

Peter Rosen

Lucky 13

Mwahahahaha!

No Christmas comes this year! Santa is captured! The failure to solve the last of the Suanda puzzles means that we will never let Peter go! And toast will be removed from the planet!

Mwahahahaha!

Ron Petrese

You Have a Problem

Hello and welcome. I have good news. Jasmine Crespo is now on our side. She has decided to join us after a very long debate between me and Patrick Suanda (If you haven't read the 84 comment yet, I warn you, it might take an hour or so to read the whole thing.). Other good news, is that we are very close to Peter's destination, and will have him back in the next day at most. In other news, we now know that Patrick Suanda is attempting an attack on Murray and have seen many of him goons, busy. We have seen them going to almost every building in Murray and running back out. We have found nothing unusual in the place they were at. We have captured three members, but they are not saying anything. Also, I have heard of another organization. There call themselves Soft, or S of T, or something like that. They say that they go where the toast goes, but I am not really sure. They seem to be on our side, but I can't really tell. I will inform you when I know more about this organization. I warn everybody in Murray of what is going on, and I hate to say this, but your friends, might in fact be your enemy. We cautious.

Aninimous

26 Ways to Fail

It's what you all have been waiting for...

Penguins!

Or P! P is an amazing letter! It even starts off an amazing number... Pi! Which is (This is only to the millionth decimal place. It goes on forever...so...) (for those of you who don't have it memorized.(I do to the 8th place value)):

3. 14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510
58209749445923078164062862089986280348253421170679
82148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128
48111745028410270193852110555964462294895493038196
44288109756659334461284756482337867831652712019091
Obviously that is not the millionth decimal place, I have just spent the last hour trying to get this thing to do a million but it almost crashed my computer.
What else is there that starts with P? Peter Rosen? Ooh... Interesting idea.. wait oh... no.. that's... too... okay moving on. Ellipses! Hehehe... Polaroids?
Polar Bears?? It's getting to near Christmas.. Which I love! Don't we all love Christmas....
Con mi burrito sabanaro voy camino de belen..... Noel noel!...
铃儿响叮当 or 门铃 (I'm not sure I don't speak/read chinese. Sorry Peter.)
Okay now I'm having difficulties with tape... darn... I WANT WHAT IS INSIDE OF YOU STUPID BOX! Okay sorry that was my inner monologue going there.
I love seeing people open stuff during Christmas, especially cards because no one can open a card perfectly. (evil laugh) That's it! People!
People come in many type, shapes and colors. (That sounded weird but let's roll with it! ) People are very interesting especially their habits. I am very observant but very rarely vocalize it so sorry. Some people: (note these are actual things I have noticed about you guys.) Some bite their lower lip when concentrating, some grab their necklaces... A LOT... some make really weird faces, some noses flare when they are lying... some always run their had through their hair. Some laugh in a very... interesting manner. Some play an imaginary piano, ( this one SO applies to me. Thank you for the smirk and the many hand slappings in geography while watching videos Taylor).
Remember: ENTER IN MY RUBE GOLDBERG CONTEST
Have a nice break Wednesday and remember, this was the Monday of school for the rest of the year... DUN DA Daah!
THE SSS! ANINIMOUS! >:D, AHHHHHHH! (better than putting in too many exclamation points.)
Hehehe, okay that was a little fun. Now for some more fun stuff!
Just take the "Doom" Song and replace the word doom for Pengy or penguin. Hehehe.... Okay.... I'm still hyper from 4th period. No more sugar.. seriously it makes me super hyper if I get enough.. especially OREOS! I have a few stories about oreos..... BAD SLEEPOVER... But licorice is always a favorite... (evil laugh) Note: I found the last remaining piece of licorice in my basement a week after school ended last year. So close.. THEN SOMEONE JUST HAD TO STEAL MY SPRITE! :) My apologies again Taylor.
To stop from saying anything else stupid...

Jasmine Crespo

Attack of the Jellyfish!

Greetings! I am the ambassador of the Union of the Jellyfish and the Man of War jellyfish are my escorts. I am here to inform you that your petty arguments are coming to an end. We intend to kill you all in one final stroke. Do not resist, for we have many alliances and it would be unnecessary for us to mobilize them. Thank you for your time.
-The Jellyfish Ambassador

Lucky 13

How did Jasmine find out that last clue? It was supposed to be impossible. Okay, now it's time for the Rumpelstiltskin clue. What is my real name?

Ron Petrese

You Have a Problem

Hello and welcome.

I am doing this a little bit early, because I have finished all of my work for now. Now onto the real news. Marisa Bell has in fact been captured by the"Marble Sail" and Allie Neff has been broken out of prison as well. This is very bad news, but the good news is that we are closing in on the location of Patrick Suanda, Kevin the Driver, Ron Petrese, Santa Claus and Peter Rosen. We expect to get them back in the next couple of days. Also, the children across the world are still revolting against their fellow students. We are hoping to get Santa back, so the revolts stop. Also, I have a riddle, I sometimes do riddles when I am stressed. Here it is.

How long is a Chinese man.

Well, so long for now.

Aninimous

P.S. Please answer my question on a previous post.

Welcome to Your Worst Nightmare.

I'm sorry to make this short, but I am here to inform you that one of your number has been taken custody of. Some of you know a person called "Marisa Bell", if that is so, you shall never see her on this blog unless you find her and rescue her. And yes Aninimous, this is an act of the SSS to weaken you. *evil laugh*

-The Marble Sail

26 Ways to Fail

Today is origami.
Origami (折り紙?, from ori meaning "folding", and kami meaning "paper") is the traditional Japanese folk art of paper folding, which started in the 17th century AD and was popularized in the mid-1900s. It has since then evolved into a modern art form. The goal of this art is to transform a flat sheet of material into a finished sculpture through folding and sculpting techniques, and as such the use of cuts or glue are not considered to be origami.

The number of basic origami folds is small, but they can be combined in a variety of ways to make intricate designs. The most well known origami model is probably the Japanese paper crane. In general, these designs begin with a square sheet of paper whose sides may be different colors or prints. Traditional Japanese origami, which has been practiced since the Edo era (1603–1867), has often been less strict about these conventions, sometimes cutting the paper or using nonsquare shapes to start with.
(From Wikipedia)

I used to do a lot of origami in 4th grade but since I lost the book I only know how to make a piano, fish and crane. Well I tried figuring out Ron Petrese's logic puzzle and it has some inconsistencies and needs one more solid clue to solve. Bye for now.

Jasmine Crespo

P.S.
The obvious teems in to what appears wrong. Though something dark (yet light) lies within. It started small but grew big way before its time. Only one will know or find out. Most likely for the secret is immense and the keeper not so trusting. All shall be revealed on the morrow by some way over this weekend.
*Notice one dead give away is if I'm reading Romeo and Juliet
The Second is what that is.
The third explains part.
After the third the fourth explains all.
Too bad tomorrow is the 17th.
Or maybe not.