Jokes by Dallas Anderson

Hey guys,

I was reading Stephanie's joke (which by the way is hilarious) and I started looking for other funny jokes. Here are some I've heard or that I got online:

A sincere marriage gift
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed.She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house.She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.Bob has been missing since Friday.


Only three doors
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a lay over in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"


Two zebras pondering
Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."

MY ALL TIME FAVORITE JOKES
http://www.coolfunnyjokes.com/Funny-Jokes/Misc-Jokes/101-Ways-To-Annoy-People.html (if you have time, read them all. They are soooooo funny!)

http://www.rinkworks.com/brick/ (read all of them)

The average person laughs about 127 times a day. Unfortunately, I can say that I don't. Thankfully, though, there are solutions to these problems. These websites can get your daily laughter in within two minutes. By the way, laughter can add up to seven years of life.

Dallas Anderson